University is a time of transition for most students and it is easy to feel like you are missing out on the trademark “university experience”, especially if you don’t drink. It would be fair to say Universities in the UK have a drinking culture and fear of missing out (FOMO) can be a heightened feeling amongst freshers. 

In this blog, I will be talking about my experiences as a student who has never drunk alcohol (yep, completely teetotal), and hopefully giving you some tips on how you can have a great time at university without feeling the need to drink if you are abstaining for specific reasons, be that religious, health or addiction-related, or maybe even that you just don’t like hangovers.  

For many, the independence to drink alcohol at university is definitely a big part of their experience and they look forward to this. There is nothing wrong with responsible drinking (if it is actually responsible) and many find it works as a social lubricant or a helpful dose of ‘liquid courage’ to help you become more outgoing. Again, this is fine. But the point I want to make this Dry January is that you do not actually NEED to drink to experience the “positive” effects of alcohol.  

You can still go up to someone and ask them what course they are doing or if they have any siblings while being sober. This will be intimidating for many, but especially in the first year, everyone has a license to sit next to someone random in a lecture and ask these questions and it is perfectly normal (and from the other person’s perspective, everyone wants to make new friends). The more times you practice being socially sober, the easier it gets. If you google the side effects of alcohol, I promise it isn’t going to come back telling you that with each sip you will turn into more of a social butterfly; though you will become less inhibited (amongst other things). In the Disney movie Dumbo, Dumbo the elephant always had massive ears and could fly, he just believed that the magic feather was allowing him to fly rather than his own ears. 

I would actually argue that in the long run, not drinking and doing the things others need alcohol to do makes you much more confident, since you are not dependent on a drug to be social, and you build a level of trust in yourself (though once again, having fun drinking responsibly is perfectly fine). 

People choose not to drink for various reasons and they should stick by those convictions if they are important to them. Having the courage to be yourself is important and you will like yourself more for not going against your beliefs or health requirements just to try and fit in with what might be the wrong crowd for you. 

There are many societies and sports clubs you can join at Reading University. They offer many opportunities to do really cool things that don’t involve alcohol and make friends in the process. Personally, I can’t see the argument that drinking is more fun or rewarding than climbing a mountain with a group or learning a martial art or dancing etc. I have met a lot of people from societies I attend who don’t drink, and these people are usually very open to suggestions to watch movies, go to eat out or have study sessions in the library together.   

As someone who doesn’t drink, I do often find myself going out with people who do drink and I do see where the concern and anxiety comes in for many teetotallers or abstainers. I go to watch football games at Park Bar and the Dairy around campus and a lot of my friends/the crowd in general are drinking. You will get the odd comment about your decision. Still, if you remind yourself of your reasoning behind drinking, it is easy to brush these comments off and focus on watching the game with your friends (who will probably lose the ability to coherently comment on your abstinence within two hours anyway). If you do drink and have friends who are not drinking, please don’t be one of these people. 

So, my overall message to those worried about struggling to fit in while not drinking is that you are not alone. I and many others had these same worries but I want you to know that it is not as impossible as you think. Many students don’t drink, for whatever reason, and they want friends just like you. Everybody wants more friends in general and to be honest, you don’t even need to specifically go out searching for teetotallers, people will be attracted to someone confident in themselves and their beliefs/decisions. You will meet people who like you for who you are, not how well you handle your drink. Drinking responsibly is fine, and if you don’t drink, join some societies and you will find like-minded people to make friends with. 

Good luck this Dry January and beyond! I’m rooting for you.